Game plan for BFFN 2

[annathepiper]

So, yeah. Didn't post about this on Friday due to general stress and distraction, but for the sake of getting caught up, here's what's going on.


On Friday, I went in for a rush-job mammogram on the left side, so as to determine whether it was going to be a problem along with the right. They took quite a few shots in the machine at several uncomfortable angles, and then they sent me over to have an ultrasound of that breast for good measure.

Dr. Carlson, the same lady who did my biopsy, informed me that there wasn't anything of immediate concern in there--just a few entirely harmless cysts that she said were completely normal. However, there was this weird shadowing that she saw in places, and she wasn't at all sure what was up with that. Between this and the fact that I'm looking at a potential double mastectomy here, she recommended that I go ahead and have an MRI done on the left just to be sure of what's going on in there.



solarbird and I went in to talk to Dr. Towbin today and basically start laying down a game plan. Biggest question to settle: take off one, or both?

As I told Dr. Towbin, I've been putting a lot of thought into this. And I haven't really budged much off my opinion on the matter, a few days after getting the news: to wit, I'm still feeling like I ought to lose both of them. There are two major reasons for this: 1) I don't trust my system not to throw me another vicious curveball on the left side, and 2) there's the whole question of whether Dara and I can ever have a child.

I'm pushing 40. I'm also on Tamoxifen, and one is not supposed to get pregnant when taking this drug. However, if I go through the entire five-year course of the medication, this means that probably the earliest I could legitimately try to conceive is around age 45. Which is really late in the game.

So yeah, we're looking at a two-fer here.

Dr. Towbin certainly felt that both of my concerns here were very valid, and he was supportive of the pregnancy reason for wanting to back off the Tamoxifen. I would be able to drop it, apparently, with a double. I also will not require either radiation or chemo. So there's that at least.

We also discussed what my options are for breast reconstruction. We touched on this only in very general terms, since Dr. Towbin recommended that I consult with a specialist on Evergreen's staff about this. But on that general level, we did discuss that my two major options here would be either tissue relocation or implants.

I'm kind of inclined towards the former, at the moment. Gods know I have plenty of tissue to spare around my belly, but as soon as we get that consult scheduled, I'll get the appropriate recommendation for this too.

Meanwhile, Dr. Towbin thought that even if I'm going to shoot for a double, it would be appropriate to go ahead and do that MRI on the left, as this may affect technical aspects of the surgery. He also noted that I do have very dense breast tissue and it's certainly possible that some surprises may be lurking in there. So we have scheduled that MRI for Thursday.


Tuesday of next week, I go back to follow up with Dr. Towbin to discuss MRI results and hopefully also the consult mentioned behind the cuts above.

Wednesday of next week is potential Surgery Day. How long I'll be down for the count is going to depend on the MRI and the other forthcoming consult.

Comments

[mdlbear]

Best of luck! The double really does sound like the right call.

I hope it all goes smoothly.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. :)

[raise-a-jar.livejournal.com]

What a tough decision to make! But given your reasoning, the double does really sound like the right way to go. Best of luck with all of it, whatever you decide to do.

::big hugs::

[annathepiper]

*hugs back* Thanks. Yeah, I'm not terribly thrilled with all this, but now that there's a game plan in place, it's at least a tiny bit less intimidating. So.

[cruisedirector]

I'm thinking good thoughts for you.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. Much appreciated. :)

[redcolumbine.livejournal.com]

I completely agree. Once is chance, twice is "something is seriously skewed here." {hug!} And being able to end this chapter for good and all counts for a lot.

[annathepiper]

Yeah. "Peace of mind" is a big consideration here. After six straight years of medical crap, that's worth a lot to me. *hugs back!*

[angharads-house.livejournal.com]

Peace and clarity, to you and Dara. And pleasance in the experiences to come, however your choice lies.

And very gentle hugs, of course.

Gwyneth
survivor of breast cancer on both sides.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. You and others are continuing to be role models to me on how to get through this.

[agrimony.livejournal.com]

Is there any thought that the breast cancer might be related in some way to the thyroid issue?

*hugs a lot* Keeping you in my thoughts.

[annathepiper]

That very question occurred to me at the beginning of Round 1, but they told me at the time that they're not likely related. It does seem awfully coincidental to me that I had a pre-cancerous thyroid situation going on as well as DCIS, but I dunno. My best guess is maybe I was sitting in front of big ol' CRT monitors for too long in the late 80's and early 90's or something, and my throat and my breasts both got a big ol' dose of ick off of those, or something.

However, that's entirely ex recto, and I don't think I'll ever really know.

*hugs though* Thank you very much. :)

[lyonesse.livejournal.com]

i think all your thoughts sound reasonable, but i totally support getting ALL POSSIBLE DATA before surgery. (i work next to mgh's breast-mri research group, and that's the gossip from next door :)

*hugs* and good luck, my thoughts are with you.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. *hugs a bunch* Yeah, data is a good thing. Makes this whole bundle of ick at least marginally more cope-with-able.

[callibr8]

This does sound like the right call. When "nuke the site from orbit" doesn't work, a ground campaign is definitely the next step.

Let us know if there's anything we can do. ***hugs*** from me and pocketnaomi

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much, to both of you. *hugs!* I'll think about what I'd like that would be screamingly pink. :)

[starfallz.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Love you both. If there is anything I can do, let me know. I'm hoping for the best for you.

[annathepiper]

*hugs back* Thank you very much, hon. Good thoughts from afar are always welcome.

[darthhellokitty.livejournal.com]

I really admire the way you're going about this - making a totally informed decision. ***hugs***

[annathepiper]

Aw, thanks. I've gotten way more experience than I like handling medical crapola the last several years, but if there's anything I've learned from it, it's that "getting all the data" lets me handle it better. So. *hugs!*

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Well, hopefully the MRI will give you more information to take some of the doubt out of your decision, but I think your reasoning is valid on all the issues. If you can avoid lengthy courses of radiation and chemo, I think you're better to do so.

[annathepiper]

Thanks. Trying to approach this as generally sanely as possible, yeah.

Dara also has pointed out quite correctly that minimizing the number of times I'll have to face general anesthesia is a good thing, too.

[ghost-light.livejournal.com]

It sounds like you are making the right choice, but I am still sorry you're having to do it. My thoughts are with both of you.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. Appreciated.

[kathrynt.livejournal.com]

Not that my gut gets a vote, but my gut says double. Don't give it a chance to get ahead of you, you know?

and omg this sucks so bad. :-(

[annathepiper]

Yeah, the whole aspect here of "don't give this shit a chance to try again" is very strong. I can no longer afford to fuck around with this.

And indeed. I have endured some suck in my life, but this? Yeah, this has shot to the top of the list. -.-

[mojave-wolf.livejournal.com]

Damn. I feel so horrible for you about all this. Life always seems to throw some of the nastiest blows at some of the nicest people.

I wish you the best of everything, and hope you two finally start getting some positive breaks going your way to make up for all the not-so-good.

[annathepiper]

Thank you again... and yeah, I'll take a resounding SO SAY WE ALL to that.

[poetry-lady.livejournal.com]

I think the two-fer option is the wisest course--it's certainly the hardest emotionally/mentally, but quite likely the wisest in the long run for your health and well-being.

I really, really wish you a very speedy, very uncomplicated recovery, and a total respite of these sorts of things for at least the next century. OK? Universe, are you listening?

{{hugs}} Whatever you do, surgery, and post-op, I am totally supportive. It's your body, and you get to love it and care for it in whatever way makes the most sense to you. And I'm glad you have health practitioners who are taking into account many things, and being very supportive.

[annathepiper]

Thank you all around, and hugs. Yeah, the situation sucks ass, but I don't have any quibbles with the personnel at Evergreen. They're on top of it.

[marzipan-pig.livejournal.com]

Good luck with all of this, bun, and I can totally see why you would want to go for a double and then reconstruction.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. Yeah, this'll probably be the way to go unless the reconstruction specialist throws me entirely unexpected data; I'm now scheduled to talk to her on Friday.

[akadriver.livejournal.com]

I think given the whole situation, the double does sound like it might be the way to go. I will continue to keep you in my thoughts and well wishes and general virtual hugs and such.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. :)

[kieri.livejournal.com]

SeattleSparks and I both send love and hope and vibes of comfy warm socks and cats in a cuddly mood and the first puff of steam from a cup of hot chocolate and all the best, as always.

Don't forget to take some time to pamper yourself. You've got so much extra stress beating you from all angles, the little things that you can do to rejuvenate mean that much more. Even if that means blankets and chocolate and The Quick & The Dead, or a lazy day with a fan and a reaaallly tall cold drink and a fluffy novel. Sometimes Reality just needs to be given the finger and ignored for a few hours.

[annathepiper]

*snugs!* Thank you very much, both of you.

And it has already occurred to me that as I am about to spend two weeks flat on my ass, I can finally read Deathly Hallows, and also, engage in another Movie Suckoff.

But mm. Quick and the Dead. Yes, a date with Cort may also be called for. ;)

[lmarley.livejournal.com]

Dear heart. Such a challenging time. One of my oldest and best friends went through this ten years ago, and has been well and treasuring life ever since. Go and do likewise! Healing blessings to you.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much, and it is a comfort to hear about your friend successfully weathering this. I am aiming to do the same.

[janne.livejournal.com]

Wednesday sounds amazingly fast for surgery, glad there won't be too much waiting. And double seems like the safest choice, all around. Sending good vibes and wishes your way, you're on my mind a lot these days. Hope it goes as well for you as the other person I know who went through the same. *HUG*.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much hon, and yeah, this is super-fast, but I can't say that I mind! *hugs*

[damara.livejournal.com]

Good luck and best wishes... I'm sending good thoughts your way.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. :)

[prettyshrub.livejournal.com]

*HUGS*

*MOJO*

I've read that a lot of women like to make a special occasion to say good bye to their breasts when they have to have a mastectomy. I offer the suggestion of doing so yourself, for whatever it's worth.

[annathepiper]

Thanks. I dunno though, I'm kind of cranky at them at the moment. I'm more in a "DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YA ON THE WAY OUT" kind of mood. ;)

That said, a bit of a wake might be called for!

[cafiorello.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Tough decision but it makes sense. I hope it all goes well!

We're all pulling for you here!

Cathy

[annathepiper]

*hugs!* Thank you very much.

[(Anonymous)]

OMG. I'm loving the idea of a wake for your breasts. With lots of {insert beverage and dessert of your choice here}, plus music and, of course, toasts.

Lots and lots of hugs from me and Matt. I will be missing Folklife for the first time in a loooooong time this year due to WisCon; however, this facilitates the possibility of bringing you a present from Madison. I'll email you and Dara next week to see when you are able to receive visitations. Stay strong and stay your lovable upbeat self, and call for help if you need anything -- remember, I'm underemployed and happy to do stuff for ya.

[annathepiper]

I am NOT NOT NOT going to filk "Paddy Murphy"....

"That's how we showed our respect for Anna's boobies / That's how we toasted her honor and her pride..."

Okay, maybe I'll filk it a little. ;)

Re: a present, aw, thank you for thinking of me, and I'll look for that email. It's not nailed down for final yet, but it's still highly likely that Surgery Day is Wednesday.

[annathepiper]

Hee, no problem. :)