Murkworks medical adventures, 2007 Redux

[annathepiper]

Apparently, solarbird and I are still not allowed to get through a year without a major medical situation coming up.

I have been informed this afternoon that I have a lump in my breast and that things are going to have to happen because of it.


What's happened up until now is this.

This spring I had to change doctors, since my previous GP was moving her practice. So I started going to a doctor at the clinic in Woodinville, and as part of establishing a history with her, I had her give me a physical. Since I'm 38 this year and therefore closing in on 40, and also because there's a history of cancer in my family, she strongly recommended I have a mammogram. I had the mammogram, and the general result of that was that they said I had some microscopic calcified bits in my right breast that they were worried about, and that I should have a biopsy.

Last week I had the biopsy. I didn't post about it because the notion of something going on in my breast really kind of scared me, and I suppose I didn't really want to talk about it unless there was something I actually needed to talk about.

Well, this afternoon I got a call from a nurse at the surgical clinic where the biopsy was done. She told me that they found indications of a lump about 6cm in size, and she used the phrase "ductal carcinoma in situ". Dara has looked this up and from what she finds so far, this is pretty much Stage 0 Breast Cancer, which means I'm going to have to have some radiation therapy. This fits in with what the nurse was telling me; she says I'll probably have to have an MRI to see exactly what's going on in there, almost certain surgery to get out whatever's left in there, and likely radiation therapy as well.

I'm trying very hard not to freak the fuck out. Mom died at 38 from cancer. I'm 38 this year. The parallel is blatant, and while I'm rationally aware that I'm me and not my mother, still.

Folks, if you can share stories with me from your own experience or from those of friends or loved ones about people who have faced this and have come through it okay, I'd really appreciate it. I need to hear about people who have beaten things like this. Dara says that from what she's read this is explicitly called a non-fatal form of cancer, which is a Good Thing, and that radiation therapy will strongly cut down my chances of developing scarier breast cancer later. But it'll also help if I hear about concrete examples of successful treatment of this, too.

Also, hugs and good energies and lit candles are good, too. We're gonna need 'em. Thanks in advance.

Comments

[grian-ruadh.livejournal.com]

Oh great big hugs to you and Dara, sweetie. You will certainly be in my thoughts as you're dealing with this.

If you have not yet seen or read The Secret (http://www.thesecret.tv), I highly recommend it.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much, hon. *hugs*

[risu.livejournal.com]

*hugs* *hugs* *hugs*

[annathepiper]

*hugs a bunch*

[mistwolf.livejournal.com]

Oh, goddess. I don't have much in the way of stories, but I will definatly send what energy and love I can. Love you guys a lot!

[annathepiper]

*hugs* That'll work. Thank you very much.

[risu.livejournal.com]

I've only really known one person with cancer. That was my cousin Megan; she had a brain tumor. They removed it---around the time I was moving in at the old murk, for a timeframe---and she's been fine ever since. She had a kid a year or two later, and as of a few months back (the last time I asked), she's doing absolutely fine.

I'm very glad you caught this early. I love you and I am freaked but I am rationally and irrationally confident it will be okay.

[annathepiper]

Let's hear it for Megan, thank you for sharing that story. It helps.

I'm starting to be a bit less freaked and a bit more "okay, let's beat this sunuvabitch". It kind of helps to have had the practice run with the whole thyroid thing, I guess.

Also, Kathryn's dubbing it a Big Fat Fucking Nuisance oddly helps, because "BIG FAT FUCKING NUISANCE" is fun to say.

[l-l-u-w-d.livejournal.com]

I know of several people who have gone through what you are going through, and have come through it all with flying colors. Seriously, what most cancer survivors that I know of, at any rate, will tell you is that your state of mind carries a great deal of weight in how you deal with the illness, and the treatment, because sometimes, the treatment itself is harder on you than the illness is, depending on the stage they catch it in. My mother had to go through extensive radiation and chemotherapy treatments, and vowed vehemently that she was /not/ going to be sick as a result, as so many people are. And, lo and behold, she was not nearly as ill as a result of the treatments as she had been led to believe she would have been.

Keep your chin up, and your thoughts positive, even when it may seem almost impossible to do so, because, just like in everything else, where your mind goes, so too do you, pretty much. You have some wonderful people pulling for you and sending positive thoughts and vibes your way, and those things have a way of being contagious. Good luck, and take care of yourself.


Barb

[annathepiper]

It does help a lot, yeah, knowing that there are others out there who have done this; it also helps that I've kind of dealt with a lesser version of this kind of thing already, with my thyroid situation. Thank you very much for chiming in, I really appreciate it!

[lethendy.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'll be keeping you all in my thoughts....

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. Much appreciated. *hugs*

[gerimaple.livejournal.com]

holy Mother of Gods :( *HUGS* to you all, and many best wishes flying south as I write.

[annathepiper]

*hugs a bunch* Thank you, hon. Very much appreciated.

[desert-dragon42.livejournal.com]

*hugs* and I will point you at my friend tealcuttlefish who likely will be able to offer you lots of advice and support.

If Jay and I can do anything for you, please let us know!

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much, hon. *hugs* I will.

[flashfire.livejournal.com]

Yeah, this sucks. Fortunately it sounds like something that can be dealt with early, and hopefully that'll be the last of it.

Hang in there.

[annathepiper]

Thanks much. Yeah, the preliminary data I'm getting is pretty much presenting it in terms of a Big Fat Fucking Nuisance, and that's something I can kind of deal with. Also, it's kind of fun to yell "BIG FAT FUCKING NUISANCE!"

[seimaisin.livejournal.com]

{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}

My friend dragonsinger just had surgery yesterday - hers was slightly more advanced than you describe yours, so she's spent the last six months doing chemo, and now has had the mastectomy and reconstruction. Her doctors constantly gave her positive feedback, saying that she was immensely curable, and now she's at the end of her ordeal. So, I have all the faith in the world that you'll come through in the end with flying colors.

All the love and good thoughts in the world for you.

[annathepiper]

Thanks very much for chiming in, hon, and best of luck to dragonsinger as well. *hugs*

[casirafics.livejournal.com]

*hugs* It sounds like it was caught plenty early, which is always for the best. Sending good thoughts. (You might want to try trading notes with rachelcaine....)

[annathepiper]

Yeah, I'm very grateful that my new doctor seems to be very on top of things, and errs on the side of caution. I've contacted her with a request for advice on how to proceed with her while I'm dealing with getting information from the surgeon.

(And heh, I thought pretty much immediately of rachelcaine, yeah, juggling breast cancer and a day job and writing.)

[waysofseeing.livejournal.com]

*big hugs* Good luck. Remember to breathe.

Better to catch this stuff early than later.

[annathepiper]

*hugs a bunch* Thank you. Breathing: I'm for it!

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

'in situ' are always the magic words with cancers - it hasn't had a chance to go anywhere, so it's just a matter of taking it out, and since the radiotherapy is precautionary, it shouldn't be high or nasty doses. Good luck with the surgery, and get it done as fast as possible.

[annathepiper]

Thanks much, this is fitting in with what I'm hearing from others. I go to consult with the surgeon tomorrow about what happens next. I expect there will be MRI and surgery pretty much ASAP.

Don't panic.

[sistawendy.livejournal.com]

My mom the nearly lifelong smoker in her 60s beat something much like this, so your odds are really, really good.

Re: Don't panic.

[annathepiper]

Heh. Good example. ;) Thank you!

[cubes.livejournal.com]

A friend of mine is a survivor. She continued working, volunteering, and playing violin in the community orchestra right through her chemo. She says that having things to do every day kept her going.

A friend of my mother's got through it many years ago (and is still kicking today), when they didn't discover things so early or have the advanced treatments they have today. She lost her breast and her hair, but kept her sense of humor. One of the favorite stories is of her and my mother sitting in church when my mother complained about the heat. This woman shot back, "You're hot? Be glad you're not wearing a wig, a girdle, and a rubber tit!"

[annathepiper]

Thank you for sharing these examples, I definitely appreciate it. I do have things that I will keep right on doing; I've got novels to write, dammit. ;)

Also, your mother's friend sounds great. :)

[kohaku1977.livejournal.com]

My mum had a tumor removed the size of a ping pong ball and she is doing great now. She comes up clean every follow up.

You'll be in my thoughts. I'll definitely light a candle for you.

*hugs*

[annathepiper]

*hugs back* Thank you very much, and I am delighted to hear that your mum is well and hanging in there.

[angelina-zooma.livejournal.com]

*big hugs*

The only story I can share is of my boyfriend's mom. She had, I believe, uterine cancer about a year and a half ago. She had surgery to remove the bad bits and has been completely fine since.

[annathepiper]

*hugs back* Thank you, and glad to hear that your boyfriend's mom is in good shape now!

[firni.livejournal.com]

A friend's wife was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2002. She had surgery, chemo, the whole route (I think hers was diagnosed later) and she's still with us.

HUGS and here's some from the Russell icon HUGS

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much, hon. Good to hear about your friend hanging in there.

Also, pictures and icons of Russell are always a plus.

[drglam]

Oh sweetie! It really should be someone else's turn for a while.

My 93 year old grandmother had surgery for breast cancer a couple of months ago, and is back to being as mean as ever.

[annathepiper]

Indeed, I am seriously goddamn tired of medical adventures. Five years in a row now, and we're still paying off last year's round, too. :P

However, I am delighted to hear about your grandmother, especially the part where she's 93 and mean. I aspire to be mean at that age!

[kieri.livejournal.com]

My grandmother had breast cancer when she was about 59 - went through radiation and chemo and all of that. She went into remission and has been clear for years now. My aunts and cousins do the Walk For The Cure every year, and I keep meaning to join them but I was overseas the last few years.

*hugs tight*

It's a bitch, but it you can beat it. Love and positive energy comin' atcha from over here.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much, and I'm glad to hear that your grandmother came through okay!

kathrynt has firmly pronounced that I can officially think of this as a Big Fat Fucking Nuisance, which in a weirdly odd way actually kind of helps. I can bark "BIG FAT FUCKING NUISANCE" with gusto.

[ghost-light.livejournal.com]

*hugs* You are in my thoughts! I am so sorry.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. *hugs back*

[darthhellokitty.livejournal.com]

Well, it sucks that you have ANYTHING, but it's excellent that they found it while it was tiny and self-contained. Remember that where medicine is concerned, things are VERY different now from when your mother was your age. You are going to be fine. ***hugs***

[annathepiper]

Eh, 6cm ain't exactly tiny. :/ But yes. The nurse pretty much did pitch this the same way my arm break was pitched to me, to the effect of "if this had to happen at all, this is the least scary way it could have happened".

And I'm very grateful that my GP erred on the side of caution and that this has been pegged before it got any worse, indeed. Thanks hon. *hugs*

[ceallaighgirl.livejournal.com]

Eek, scary. I'll keep you in my prayers!

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. Much appreciated.

Survivor's story

[angharads-house.livejournal.com]

You don't know me; we never met, we very likely will never, I live in my own corner of the Salish Sea and keep a suitably low profile.

MANY years ago, I found a lump in my left breast during BSE (which, despite all the stuff going round about it being statistically pointless, does find lumps and that's good). Went to doctor who expressed surprise since my most recent mammo two months previously had come back clear. I complained, told them exactly where it was, asked for the radiologist to look again at the films.

She found the shadow. Of course it was where I thought it was. Fingers don't lie. Went for a biopsy, came back positive. Had it cut out (a partial, the scar is not excessive). Had chemo. Got sick. Had radiation. Got burned.

Survived.

Then my step-daughter (no genetic relation) found a lump in her breast. Went the same route, but they caught it too late, and she didn't make it. I still miss her.

No point in questioning the luck of the draw -- you got the lump. Only questions now are:

1. what do you intend to do about it?, and

2. what do you intend to do with your life?

As my oncologist double-dared me, "why aren't you doing what you really want to do in your life?" I took her up on that challenge, and am still alive, a survivor with ups and downs, but still here.

18 years.

My step-daughter gave in to it. Lasted one year.

Fight.

Done talking. Hope this helps. My oncologist says to me "you are living proof that cancer is a manageable condition." Hell yes, it is.

Good luck. Candle happening.

---->Angharad Lewis from Vancouver Island, breast cancer survivor

Re: Survivor's story

[annathepiper]

Angharad, thank you for coming by to share your story with me. It does help. Very much. I've had a bit of a dry run already with the thyroid issues I've had to go through; in 2004 and 2005, I had my thyroid removed in two surgeries, since it was generating nodules that were found to be pre-cancerous. The biggest of these got up to about the same size as this thing in my breast, 6cm.

So even though this news sucks like very few other things suck, between my thyroid experience and my mother's history, it's not entirely a surprise. I've been dealing with the thyroid thing for the last two years; I'll deal with this, too.

One of my local friends tonight firmly dubbed this whole thing a Big Fat Fucking Nuisance, which, oddly, helps. If nothing else because "BIG FAT FUCKING NUISANCE" is fun to say, and also puts it in terms of something that can be beaten.

I'm not going to be beaten. I have novels to write. :)

[cafiorello.livejournal.com]

Major hugs! I've never gotten farther than biopsies, but I did lots of research at those times and what you've got is the least bad version. Sorry I can't share a super success story, but positive thoughts are on your way.

Cathy

[annathepiper]

If I can't get a success story, I'll definitely take data. Data is good. Dara looked some stuff up about this, as did kathrynt's father; Kathryn relayed that the first Google hit her dad got on this topic was something to the effect of "Should DCIS be considered breast cancer?" (The answer was apparently 'yes', but it's at least a little reassuring that there's some small debate about it.)