This is it, folks...

[annathepiper]

Tomorrow is Surgery Day. I have to go without dinner tonight, and I have to get up at godawful-early-thirty with solarbird, who will drive me to the hospital since I will not be allowed to wear my contacts tomorrow morning. The good part is, at least, that I don't have to worry about testing anything for the next two weeks.

And now, my Top Ten List of Things I Promise Not to Do At the Hospital Tomorrow:

10. Just as I'm going under with the anesthesia, peer at the scalpel and say, "Ooh, that looks like fun. Can I try?"
9. Look suspiciously at the first nurse who administers my painkiller after I wake up, and demand to know if they're a Cylon.
8. Leave my bed in the middle of the night, find something wooden, sharp, and pointy, and look for any bodies with suspicious bite marks on the neck.
7. Demand to know whether the tissue extracted from my neck will be fed to any ravening demons to give them my scent for later hunting and consumption.
6. Draw extra scars on my throat, using red Magic Marker.
5. Draw extra scars on the throat of whatever patient is sharing my room with me overnight.
4. Accuse the other patient in the room of being a zombie, and hide my head under pillow so as to conceal my large, tasty brain.
3. Imperiously order the night nurse to bathe Alan Doyle and bring him to my "chamber".
2. Claim that removed thyroid was in fact conjoined twin, and insist that it is going to sneak into my room through the air vents in the middle of the night, bent on once more becoming one with its host.

And the Number One Thing I Promise Not to Do At the Hospital Tomorrow:

1. When asked what medications I am taking prior to the surgery, say, "Kamala extract." Feign hallucinations and start quoting from the Scrolls of Pythia, and demand to know when I can address the Fleet to assure them that it is my sole purpose to lead them to Earth.

Monday miles: 0.1
Miles out of Hobbiton: 319.3
Miles to Rivendell: 138.7

Comments

[ravenlaughing.livejournal.com]

You are so funny! I've got healing thoughts for you...

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much. :)

[celandineb.livejournal.com]

I'll be sending good thoughts your way tomorrow, hoping it all goes well!

[annathepiper]

Thank you kindly! :)

[seimaisin.livejournal.com]

You do realize that I would pay you good money to do any of those things, right?

{{{{{hugs}}}}} Good luck, sweetie - I'll be thinking about you tomorrow!

[annathepiper]

Thank you! And the deuce of the matter is, I won't have the BRAIN to do them tomorrow. See previous commentary re: Percocet. ;) *hugs!*

[kaseido.livejournal.com]

LMAO!!!!

All our thoughts and hugs over here!

[annathepiper]

Thank you! :)

[grian-ruadh.livejournal.com]

I'll be thinking good thoughts for you tomorrow, sweetie. I've had thyroid problems too since I was 22 but nothing so serious as to require the route you're having to go. I hope the surgery goes well and that it has the desired impact on your health. *hugs!*

[annathepiper]

*hugs back!* Thank you much. :)

[grumpywitch.livejournal.com]

Fingers crossed and *healing vibes* at the ready!

[annathepiper]

Thanks! :)

*snugs*

[eveshka.livejournal.com]

Be safe, and know that you are loved.

If you post your hospital info, we will call. (No, that's not a threat. It's a promise :) )

You're in my thoughts and prayers, as always.

Re: *snugs*

[annathepiper]

I'll be at Swedish Medical Center tomorrow, as was the case last year.

However--while calls would not be unwelcome, I cannot guarantee ability to talk. ;) Or at least, ability to talk for more than a minute or so! Though my memory of last year's post-surgery hours is a bit fuzzy, I don't think I managed much above a whisper for very long until after a day or two.

Regardless, thoughts and prayers are welcome. Thank you very much. :)

[mikekn]

I like 'em - you're very silly.

I hope everything goes great. Take care.

[annathepiper]

I try! And thank you much. :)

[firni.livejournal.com]

Tell them the conjoined twin's name was Belial.

(hugs)

[annathepiper]

And that it whispers to me in the darkness!

*hugs!*

[starfallz.livejournal.com]

6. Draw extra scars on my throat, using red Magic Marker.


Aaaaaw... why not?? :D


4. Accuse the other patient in the room of being a zombie, and hide my head under pillow so as to conceal my large, tasty brain.

Sounds like a good idea to me, really.... never know with them zombies....

Anyways, I'll be thinking about you tomorrow. *tight snugs*

[annathepiper]

I'm pretty sure there will be a distinct shortage of red Magic Markers in my immediate vicinity after the surgery tomorrow.

However, I shall endeavor to make my brain look as unappetizing as possible to the zombie who will be sharing the room with me!

*snugs back!*

[cafiorello.livejournal.com]

LOL! Hope it all goes well tomorrow!
Cathy

[annathepiper]

Thank you much! So do I. :)

[damara.livejournal.com]

Good luck. I'll be thinking of you and sending good wishes your way.

[annathepiper]

Much appreciated! Thank you very much. :)

[emmacrew.livejournal.com]

Here's hoping everything goes as well as possible tomorrow and that your recovery is speedy and uneventful. Let me know if you need anything!

[annathepiper]

Thank you much! Suggestions on tasty easy-on-sore-throat things to eat throughout the rest of the week would be good. (Last year, kathrynt made me tasty beef & barley soup.) I think I went back to Real Food(TM) a bit early, so I need to be more careful about that this time around! And I'll have solarbird doublecheck with the doctor what'll be good to eat.

[otoselkie.livejournal.com]

Well, I know I've come too late for you to read this, but, I send you good wishes, blessings and positive vibes from my side of the country.

4. Accuse the other patient in the room of being a zombie, and hide my head under pillow so as to conceal my large, tasty brain.

Well, you never know.....

[annathepiper]

Nope, not too late yet! I have several hours yet before I head to sleep and then to surgery! So thank you very much. :)

I shall be on the lookout for patients mumbling "braaaaaaaaaains" in my vicinity, I can assure you.

[mizkit.livejournal.com]

Good luck with it all. *hugs*!

[annathepiper]

*hugsaKit!* Thank you!

[irysangel.livejournal.com]

Dood! Skip the 'drawing extra scars' thing and go for random arrows that have 'Incision here' next to them. Oooh! Oooh! Better yet, draw the 'Operation Game' on your body.

As for visitors, you could always blackmail them. "Give me $5.00 or I'll make you change my bedpan."

Seriously though, surgery sucks but there's worse out there! You'll pull through with flying colors!

[annathepiper]

Fortunately I did not have to deal with a bedpan--I was able to actually get up and go to the bathroom. :)

And it turned out that I did in fact have to get Dara to draw my initials on my neck on the left side. Why this was actually supposed to help anything, I do not know!

[king-chiron.livejournal.com]

Heh, very cute. I'm sure everything will go just great! *hugs*

[annathepiper]

*hugs back* Thanks! And it did go very well overall. :)

[annathepiper]

Thanks! :)

[me-fein.livejournal.com]

Mmmmm...Alan Doyle.....

[annathepiper]

Quite. ;)

[casirafics.livejournal.com]

*big hugs* and I love your list. :)

[annathepiper]

Thank you! :) *hugs*

[waysofseeing.livejournal.com]

All the best in healing thoughts to you, Anna. A gezunt ahf dein kop, and peace to you.

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much!

But, er, what's this part: A gezunt ahf dein kop? German? "A blessing on your head"? :)

[pauldf.livejournal.com]

Those hospital ideas are great! Hope everything goes smoothly!

[annathepiper]

Thank you very much! See my post from today about the details, but yeah, everything went pretty well. :) I'm home resting now!

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

I'm especially amused by #3. For some reason, I picture you decked out as one of the villains from Xena, in that same damned boudoir set they used for every boudoir scene in every episode, regardless of ostensible setting. If it's the universal boudoir, why should it not be a hospital room after all?

Anyhow, may you be a straightforward, easy case with a swift recovery.

[annathepiper]

There was a sad lack of Mr. Doyle in my hospital room. But I shall make up for it by copious amounts of music while I am recovering!

And thank you very much. :)

[pinkdormouse.livejournal.com]

Good luck with the surgery.

Gina

[annathepiper]

Thank you! :)

[suzene.livejournal.com]

3. Imperiously order the night nurse to bathe Alan Doyle and bring him to my "chamber".

It never hurts to ask, you know.

Best wishes for a swift recovery and massive doses of perscription drugs.

[annathepiper]

Hee!

And thank you. I have quite the collection of meds I have to take over the next week, indeed!