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Aug. 17th, 2004 09:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
annathepiperLady Dragon, by Jewell Mason. With a title like that and a name like that, it's probably no surprise that this was one of the historical romances that I got as a freebie in the raffle basket I won at Writer's Weekend.
Now, I have nothing against historical romances as a genre. I've even looked over a couple I actually kind of liked. A book called Gossamer comes immediately to mind, though I didn't actually finish it--it was one of the ones I borrowed out of![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lyricae's stock while I was still working for her at her bookstore, to read during lunch. THAT was a nicely written romance novel, with good character development and an interesting plot, with more going on than just the hero and heroine making gooey eyes at one another. (I'd like to actually finish that book if I get a chance.) I like Tami Hoag's romance novels, too, the one or two she wrote before she swung over into writing romantic suspense.
However, Lady Dragon was not a nicely written romance novel. Let us count the ways as to why:
* The cover art sucked. It looked like a badly Photoshopped photograph slapped in on top of a painting, and a poorly done painting at that. Now I know you're not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but as we all know, prospective readers do just that. And if I had been in the market for a romance novel in the bookstore, this cover would have put me right off.
* The author failed the Get the Hero Wounded And Have the Heroine Have to Selflessly Tend Him test. I mean, GEEZ, how can you miss a basic staple of a romance novel plot like this? She gets the guy clonked over the head by a stone hurled by a slingshot, makes a big point of having him fall unconscious and be all dizzy and nauseous, which tells ME the guy has a concussion--and then not only is he pretty much fine the next day, but she completely misses the opportunity for the heroine to go "oh gosh! This poor man! I must selflessly tend him even though I've been really pissed off at him for the last six months!"
* And speaking of the heroine being pissed off at the hero for six months, it's a pretty damned specious reason for her to be in that state to begin with. We start off with the heroine's family getting attacked in a raid, her beloved brother getting murdered, and her mother inexplicably abandoning them in the middle of chaos and mayhem. The hero, whom the heroine has been admiring from afar throughout her childhood, bravely swoops in to save their lives--and does so. And yet, the heroine is pissed off at him for six whole months afterwards. Why? Because he didn't come back to see if she was all right. She harbors this petty little grudge against him, and convinces herself that he's an inconsiderate asshole, basically.
* The vast majority of conflict between the hero and heroine is driven by them getting inordinately pissed off over things that would not even be problems if they would just bother to TALK TO ONE ANOTHER. They hurl all sorts of wild accusations at one another, and at no point do either of them say to one another, "Uh, no, that is NOT what happened, and if you'd just shut up for a minute and listen to me, I will TELL you what happened!" Which is reason #1 as to why I spent a good chunk of the book wondering what the hell these two see in one another.
* The hero is a total jerk to the heroine. He finds out that she's not what she seems and decides unilaterally that she is a deceptive bitch. At no point does he actually ask her what the hell was going on; rather, he just flat out condemns her. And, moreover, when he places her under house arrest in her own family's castle and tells her she's going to start learning how to properly manage a household (in other words, to be a proper 'lady'--ugh), and she does this, he gets pissy when she doesn't do it in exactly the way he thinks she ought to be doing it. She tries to make him a gift, for fuck's sake, and he decides without even talking to her that she's making herself a black gown to try to get around his edict that she has to not dress like a pauper. He not only yells at her, he stomps on the shirt she was trying to make him, and grinds it into the dirt. He is a complete and utter asshole, and yet, she has decided she loves this man. WHY?!
* The author really drops the ball on what actually could have been interesting intrigue if she'd done it right. She has this scenario where the heroine is masquerading as her own dead twin brother and maintaining the illusion that he is alive--because she's taken up arms and is trying to help her village defend itself from the raiders who've been attacking it. Because of this, she's funneling all her funds into the village defenses, so she doesn't have the money to buy herself nice clothing or have any other sorts of luxuries around her family hall. She's got bruises in suspicious places, because she's been in combat. Now, our so-called hero takes this all wrong, and decides that her 'brother' is secretly beating the hell out of this girl. But does he call her on it? Does he ask her what the hell is going on? He does find out of course, but at this point he flips out completely and just decides that the heroine is a deceptive bitch, rather than actually investigating her reasons for what she's been doing. If he'd actually bothered to check out what was going on, the plot could have milked that for all sorts of fun intrigue; the hero and heroine might have teamed up to use the masquerade of her brother still being alive in order to trap the raiders. And, for that matter, the slimy villain who is out to steal the girl.
* I really, really, REALLY hated how the heroine was set up to be this bold, unconventional woman who takes up arms and learns to fight--only to turn herself into a 'lady', and cook and sew, when her man commands her to. I hated it when Anne McCaffrey made most of her strong female characters turn all gooey and domestic when they scored a man, and I hate it in this book, too.
I managed to keep reading solidly till about 2/3rds of the way through, at which point I gave up and just skimmed the rest to see if there was any sign of the ending improving things any. I saw no such improvement, and in fact, from what I could tell, the ending was absolutely incoherent. There wasn't much resolution with the whole 'raiders invading the village' problem--and the subplot with the slimy villain trying to kill the hero and heroine both was handled in a deeply lame fashion as well.
All in all, tripe. And annoying tripe at that. Not recommended!
Now, I have nothing against historical romances as a genre. I've even looked over a couple I actually kind of liked. A book called Gossamer comes immediately to mind, though I didn't actually finish it--it was one of the ones I borrowed out of
lyricae's stock while I was still working for her at her bookstore, to read during lunch. THAT was a nicely written romance novel, with good character development and an interesting plot, with more going on than just the hero and heroine making gooey eyes at one another. (I'd like to actually finish that book if I get a chance.) I like Tami Hoag's romance novels, too, the one or two she wrote before she swung over into writing romantic suspense.However, Lady Dragon was not a nicely written romance novel. Let us count the ways as to why:
* The cover art sucked. It looked like a badly Photoshopped photograph slapped in on top of a painting, and a poorly done painting at that. Now I know you're not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but as we all know, prospective readers do just that. And if I had been in the market for a romance novel in the bookstore, this cover would have put me right off.
* The author failed the Get the Hero Wounded And Have the Heroine Have to Selflessly Tend Him test. I mean, GEEZ, how can you miss a basic staple of a romance novel plot like this? She gets the guy clonked over the head by a stone hurled by a slingshot, makes a big point of having him fall unconscious and be all dizzy and nauseous, which tells ME the guy has a concussion--and then not only is he pretty much fine the next day, but she completely misses the opportunity for the heroine to go "oh gosh! This poor man! I must selflessly tend him even though I've been really pissed off at him for the last six months!"
* And speaking of the heroine being pissed off at the hero for six months, it's a pretty damned specious reason for her to be in that state to begin with. We start off with the heroine's family getting attacked in a raid, her beloved brother getting murdered, and her mother inexplicably abandoning them in the middle of chaos and mayhem. The hero, whom the heroine has been admiring from afar throughout her childhood, bravely swoops in to save their lives--and does so. And yet, the heroine is pissed off at him for six whole months afterwards. Why? Because he didn't come back to see if she was all right. She harbors this petty little grudge against him, and convinces herself that he's an inconsiderate asshole, basically.
* The vast majority of conflict between the hero and heroine is driven by them getting inordinately pissed off over things that would not even be problems if they would just bother to TALK TO ONE ANOTHER. They hurl all sorts of wild accusations at one another, and at no point do either of them say to one another, "Uh, no, that is NOT what happened, and if you'd just shut up for a minute and listen to me, I will TELL you what happened!" Which is reason #1 as to why I spent a good chunk of the book wondering what the hell these two see in one another.
* The hero is a total jerk to the heroine. He finds out that she's not what she seems and decides unilaterally that she is a deceptive bitch. At no point does he actually ask her what the hell was going on; rather, he just flat out condemns her. And, moreover, when he places her under house arrest in her own family's castle and tells her she's going to start learning how to properly manage a household (in other words, to be a proper 'lady'--ugh), and she does this, he gets pissy when she doesn't do it in exactly the way he thinks she ought to be doing it. She tries to make him a gift, for fuck's sake, and he decides without even talking to her that she's making herself a black gown to try to get around his edict that she has to not dress like a pauper. He not only yells at her, he stomps on the shirt she was trying to make him, and grinds it into the dirt. He is a complete and utter asshole, and yet, she has decided she loves this man. WHY?!
* The author really drops the ball on what actually could have been interesting intrigue if she'd done it right. She has this scenario where the heroine is masquerading as her own dead twin brother and maintaining the illusion that he is alive--because she's taken up arms and is trying to help her village defend itself from the raiders who've been attacking it. Because of this, she's funneling all her funds into the village defenses, so she doesn't have the money to buy herself nice clothing or have any other sorts of luxuries around her family hall. She's got bruises in suspicious places, because she's been in combat. Now, our so-called hero takes this all wrong, and decides that her 'brother' is secretly beating the hell out of this girl. But does he call her on it? Does he ask her what the hell is going on? He does find out of course, but at this point he flips out completely and just decides that the heroine is a deceptive bitch, rather than actually investigating her reasons for what she's been doing. If he'd actually bothered to check out what was going on, the plot could have milked that for all sorts of fun intrigue; the hero and heroine might have teamed up to use the masquerade of her brother still being alive in order to trap the raiders. And, for that matter, the slimy villain who is out to steal the girl.
* I really, really, REALLY hated how the heroine was set up to be this bold, unconventional woman who takes up arms and learns to fight--only to turn herself into a 'lady', and cook and sew, when her man commands her to. I hated it when Anne McCaffrey made most of her strong female characters turn all gooey and domestic when they scored a man, and I hate it in this book, too.
I managed to keep reading solidly till about 2/3rds of the way through, at which point I gave up and just skimmed the rest to see if there was any sign of the ending improving things any. I saw no such improvement, and in fact, from what I could tell, the ending was absolutely incoherent. There wasn't much resolution with the whole 'raiders invading the village' problem--and the subplot with the slimy villain trying to kill the hero and heroine both was handled in a deeply lame fashion as well.
All in all, tripe. And annoying tripe at that. Not recommended!