So I skipped PAX this year

[annathepiper]

… in no small part due to how I’m back in edit mode for Vengeance of the Hunter. But from what I’m hearing, first from Dara’s PAX report and then from rumblings around Twitter this morning, apparently Gabe opened his mouth again and highly unfortunate things fell out.

PAX has always been a bit of a problem for me. For one thing, hi, raging introvert girl here. So many people attend that thing that my tolerance for the crowds goes only so far if I’m there too. A couple of hours on the expo floor and eventually I get to a point of wanting to go all Invader Zim and stand up yelling STAND AWAY! YOU SMELL LIKE FEET! Which, y’know, not terribly productive.

There’s also the problem that I’ve never been a console gamer. There’s other types of gaming covered at PAX, sure–Big Fish has had a booth there the last couple of years, so casual games do have a presence. I’m given to understand we were hawking our forthcoming Zombie Zombie Zombie match 3 game, and yeah, I’ll be playing the hell out of that. But mostly, the whole event is filled with stuff I’ve never been particularly interested in. I quite enjoy watching Dara and Paul play various console games, and experiencing their stories vicariously–I really liked the storyline of the BioShock games, enough that I went and grabbed the tie-in novel just so I could read about the founding of Rapture. Portal and Portal II, also great fun to watch, and of course between Paul and Dara we’ve been HOUSE OF SKYRIM for a while now too. Also great fun to watch, if nothing else because Skyrim’s always struck me as a way fancier version of Nethack.

But. Looking from the outside in, and seeing repeated incidents of misogyny and queerphobia in gaming culture, I can’t help but get a big vibe of ‘yeah that? That’s not for me.’

I’ll be going to GeekGirlCon, though. And who knows? Maybe I’ll see something there that’ll change my mind about console gaming, even before Dara and Paul launch their campaign to try to pull me into Elder Scrolls Online next year.

ETA: First of the pertinent commentary links that have come across my radar: From Make Me a Sammich, who has generally Had Enough of This Shit

ETA #2: Elizabeth Sampat says Quit Going to PAX already, in no uncertain terms (Dara’s in the comments over there, too)

Mirrored from angelahighland.com.

Comments

[prettyshrub.livejournal.com]

I went to PAX as a volunteer board game demo-er. I pretty much hung out in my room and avoided large crowds.

The mix of people in there was great.

I was glad to support a bunch of small game companies, but I do feel uncomfortable with the sort of attitude that Gabe is promoting. Whether he intends it or not, he is encouraging people to bully women and transgendered folk.

I found this article in defense of Mike:

http://www.gamingexcellence.com/features/a-possibly-surprising-defense-of-mike-krahulik

Her take seems to be that people are jumping down his throat for his behavior instead of trying to engage in actual dialog. Perhaps this is true and if so, maybe everyone should take a giant breathe and try again.

On the other hand, she seems to also be implying that because PAX is a 'populist' event, so it should only worry about the 99% of geeks instead of worrying about the 1%. Also, that Mike is just unable to understand, and since most people don't understand, he and PAX win by default.

Also, (and I have not verified her claim) white men have a higher suicide rate, so by attacking Mike, we are potentially increasing his chance of suicide.

While I think her logic is flawed, I do agree with her point (and this point was made elsewhere) that screaming at anyone will make it harder to get them to understand your point of view.

[annathepiper]

Couple of things:

1) That link you're offering is actually a controversy behind. That's about his prior transphobic commentary, and the thing I'm actually talking about in this post is what just happened at this year's PAX, yesterday, on stage. I.e., Gabe said on stage that he thought it was a mistake taking down the Dickwolves shirts off of the PA merch page. He was supported by his business manager and was cheered by the crowd that was present.

2) I take serious issue with equating "calling Gabe out on his bullshit" with "screaming". Helpful dialogue, as I understand it, was tried a long time ago when the whole Dickwolves thing blew up in the first place. Rather than actually engaging with that dialogue, Gabe chose to be a dick in response.

If Gabe's tired of people calling him a misogynist and a transphobe, the solution to this is real simple: he stops engaging in misogynist and transphobic behavior.

Because at the end of the day, this behavior of his is exactly that: bullshit. And for me it's less of a question of any specific incident and more of an overall general pattern of bullshit behavior, coupled with no displayed interest whatsoever in actually improving said behavior.

[annathepiper]

And oh yes--I also take serious issue with even the suggestion that we might be somehow driving the man closer to suicide by attacking him and stomping all over his fragile little white boy ego.

Because seriously, "OHNOEZ PEOPLE ARE ANGRY AT ME ON THE INTERNET" ain't nothin' compared to the physical abuse, assault, degradation of rights, denial of identity, and outright murder that transfolk go through in their lives.

And I say this as someone not actually actively involved in gamer culture. I've never been a fan of Penny Arcade, and as I've posted, I've never been much interested in going to PAX, either, aside from vague interest in the casual games that show up there, and because most of my friends like to go as well. The ongoing repeating pattern of bullshit behavior out of Gabe ain't convincing me to change my mind any time soon, either.

[prettyshrub.livejournal.com]

I brought up the link just because I found the idea of PAX being a 'populist' event and therefor it being okay to cater to the most common denominator weird. I didn't express that properly, and that's my own fault.

The whole point of not catering to just the majority is that it is important to include everyone, and maybe what everyone thought was the majority really isn't the majority after all.

The 'screaming' comment was meant for both sides. If Gabe really has an explanation/point for what he says, then his screaming isn't getting it across.

However, since all he does is pitch tantrums, it really is all bullshit and he doesn't want to change his behavior.

There is other evidence of his (and Penny Arcade's) crap in their refusal to do anything about scalpers and people selling fake tickets and the whole incident with an enforcer using his position to harass someone.

I'm gonna stop trying to express myself when I am so tired. I just screw it up.

[annathepiper]

Thanks for the clarifications.

And see, here's the thing--this is not only a question of PAX not catering to people who aren't straight white cis boys. It's a question of PAX being actively hostile to people who don't fit that profile. There is a huge, huge difference between "we're not acknowledging you exist" and "we know you're there and we're actively hostile to you".

It's this latter attitude that got demonstrated by the whole initial response to the Dickwolves brouhaha, and by pretty much every controversy out of the PA crowd since. The ONLY exception to this to date has been Gabe's response to the Internet falling on his head for his transphobic commentary. I'd thought at the time when I heard about him backing off that okay, yeah, maybe the man could learn something.

But based on what happened yesterday, I'm not betting on it.

[prettyshrub.livejournal.com]

I was wondering if I would see anybody being a jerk in my gameroom, but happily people just wanted to try out games, buy them and the dice rings. I met people from all walks of life and it was a great experience.

[annathepiper]

*nodnod* I'm glad you had a good time. And there are awesome people in gaming culture. :)