WINNER: Death Bed: The Bed That Eats

[annathepiper]

I gotta say, eveshka, you chose wisely.

solarbird brought this home for me today since whoever had had it last returned it to Scarecrow. She and I just got done watching it. And this pithy quote of Dara's sums up the entire experience: "It makes Manos seem vibrant and coherent."

It really does. I am in awe of the fact that there exists a film that can make Manos: The Hands of Fate look good. I weep to think of the horror this would have inflicted on poor Joel and the Bots, even as I find myself wondering if the Cinematic Titanic people are aware of this thing. 'Cause DAMN.

Other bonus features of this thing:

• Its very own intro from the writer/director.
  
• AIGH CREEPY DEMON EYES on the DVD menu.
  
• Dividing of the film into three acts helpfully labeled Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner.
  
• The bed oozing yellow foam as it ate things. And people! It's an Evil Bed AND an Evil Yellow Bubble Bath!
  
• Movie: "Something's wrong! I must have made a mistake!" Me: "Yeah pal, you and everyone else involved with this movie."
  
• Movie: "I wonder where this house is supposed to be". Dara: "I wonder where this plot is supposed to be!"
  
• Stabbing of Evil Bed = Eating of hapless stabber guy's hands down to the bone. I'm still not sure if he survived the movie. I'm only half sure I survived the movie.

So yeah. This thing wins the March 2009 Suckoff, hands down. Well played, eveshka. Well played.

Comments

[towelwrath.livejournal.com]

Death Bed: The Bed That Steals Your Fried Chicken.

[katatomic.livejournal.com]

Now I really wish I had a copy of the short horror spoof film I helped make. You'd appreciate it.

[kendaer.livejournal.com]

A movie worse than Manos?? I almost have to see that for myself....


On second thought.. I'll take your word for it... *shudder*

[ravyngyngvar.livejournal.com]

Peculiar. Its IMDB score is five stars. I think there are DVDs in my collection with lower scores than that. Manos has only 1.5.

[gamera-spinning.livejournal.com]

That sounds like a winner. I am filled with the fear and yet...any film that makes Manos look good by comparison needs to be viewed by me.

Wow.

[annathepiper]

*looks staunch* It's okay, I took one for the team! ;)

[annathepiper]

Gives a whole new meaning to Finger Lickin' Good!

[annathepiper]

Oh wow, I would! And that had to be fun. :)

[annathepiper]

I'm sure there may be people out there who think this movie holds together better than Manos. They would be wrong. ;)

[annathepiper]

Judicious application of your b00zah0l of choice may be called for here! Good luck. You'll need it. ;)